When a miscarriage happens, one of the first questions people ask is: Why? The search for answers is natural — and painful when none are available. Unfortunately, myths and half-truths often cloud the reality.
Let’s break down what we know, what we don’t, and where research is headed.
Miscarriage in Context
A miscarriage is the loss of a pregnancy before 20 weeks (or 24 weeks according to UK guidelines). It’s more common than most people realize: around 1 in 4 clinically recognized pregnancies ends this way, with the vast majority happening in the first trimester.
In around 50% of early miscarriages, chromosomal abnormalities prevent normal embryonic development.
Common Myths vs. Facts
Myth | Fact |
“Stress, exercise, or sex caused it.” | Everyday activities, including moderate exercise or sex, do not cause miscarriage. |
“If I had eaten differently, I could have prevented this.” | No strong evidence that routine diet causes miscarriage, though severe deficiencies, unpasteurised foods, or infections (Listeria, Toxoplasma) may increase risk. |
“One miscarriage means I’ll keep miscarrying. There’s something wrong with me.” | Most people have a successful subsequent pregnancy; only ~1% experience recurrent miscarriage. |
“There must be something wrong with me.” | While miscarriage is often linked to chromosomal issues in the embryo and sperm, DNA fragmentation or chromosomal abnormalities can also contribute in some cases. |
What About Recurrent Miscarriage?
About 1 in 100 women experience recurrent miscarriage, defined as the loss of two or more pregnancies processing beyond 24 weeks' gestation.
Around half of cases remain unexplained, but potential causes include APLA, (antiphospholipid syndrome) uterine anomalies, thyroid dysfunction, and parental re-arrangements.
In the other half, the cause remains unexplained, which can feel deeply frustrating for families seeking answers.
Organizations like Tommy’s in the UK are at the forefront of research, aiming to better understand recurrent miscarriage and improve both prevention and treatment. Their work gives hope that fewer families will have to endure loss without explanation in the future.
Emotional Truth
Even when science says “it wasn’t your fault,” self-blame can creep in. Many people replay every meal, workout, or stressful day, wondering if it contributed. But the overwhelming truth is this: miscarriage is not caused by something you did or didn’t do.
If you're struggling emotionally after a miscarriage, support from organisations like Tommy's or The Miscarriage Association can help you process grief and access specialist counselling.
Key Takeaways
Most miscarriages are caused by random chromosomal issues, not something you could have prevented.
Recurrent miscarriage (3+ losses) affects 1 in 100 women; about half of cases have identifiable causes.
Research organizations like Tommy’s are working to uncover answers for families who’ve been left in the dark.
Grief and self-blame are common, but miscarriage is not your fault.
If you've experienced a miscarriage, seek medical advice to confirm the pregnancy has completely passed and to discuss any investigations or emotional support options.
💗 If you’re still asking “why,” you’re not alone. Sibyl offers gentle, evidence-based support after miscarriage — for both your questions and your healing. Sign up for the beta here: https://www.sibyl.care/signup
Sources:
