After miscarriage, many people find themselves crying more than they ever have in their lives. Tears come at unexpected moments — in the car, at work, in the shower, while walking through the supermarket. You may even feel like you can’t stop.
It can be unsettling, but here’s the truth: tears after pregnancy loss are normal. They can be your body and mind’s way of releasing grief.
Why Tears Are So Common After Miscarriage
Hormonal changes: Levels of estrogen and progesterone drop suddenly after pregnancy ends, which can cause mood swings and intensify sadness (Mayo Clinic).
Grief response: Crying is a natural outlet for sorrow, anger, and longing.
Physical exhaustion: experiencing physical complaints while grieving drains your energy and emotional reserves.
Tears don’t mean you’re weak — they are an expression of your emotions and grief.
Why am I not crying?
It’s important to understand that some people may not cry at all. The shock of the miscarriage can make you go into a protective shutdown. Psychologists call this emotional numbing or dissociation, as the mind temporarily blunts emotions to keep you functioning through a crisis.
People report feeling flat, numb or “like it hasn’t hit me yet”. It can also be because of your upbringing, cultural and social factors, which unconsciously taught you not to cry during grieving. Not crying doesn’t mean you are not grieving, or that something is “wrong” with you. Both crying a lot, and not crying are normal responses.
How Common Are Psychological Struggles After Loss?
Research shows that miscarriage doesn’t just cause sadness — it can trigger clinical mental health conditions.
About 30% of women report post-traumatic stress symptoms one month after miscarriage (Farren et al., BMJ Open, 2020).
Around 25% experience moderate to severe anxiety in the weeks following loss (Farren et al., 2020).
About 10–20% experience depression after miscarriage, higher if they’ve had repeated losses (ACOG).
Many people go through the difficult process of grief, and are able to return to their normal daily life as time passes. Some people may develop mental health conditions or worsen their existing mental health condition as a result of a miscarriage. It is important to monitor your symptoms and experiences, to see whether you might need professional help.
When Feeling Sad Is No Longer “Normal”
Feeling sad while grieving is expected. While grief has no clear timeline, most people notice some emotional easing over weeks or months. If your distress feels unchanged or worsening after around 6-8 weeks, it’s worth checking in with a professional.
The below are normal after a miscarriage, but if they carry on for a long period of time, they can be a sign to seek help:
Crying that feels constant or uncontrollable for weeks on end
Hopelessness or despair that feels constant or unrelenting
Intense anxiety or panic about the future or another pregnancy.
Loss of interest in things you normally enjoy
Flashbacks, nightmares, or intrusive thoughts about the miscarriage
Difficulty functioning at work or in daily life
Changes in your sleep and appetite. Trouble falling or staying asleep, or sleeping excessively or eating far more or less than usual
Thoughts of harming yourself or feeling like you don’t want to live. In this case, please reach out for help immediately. Google and contact your national suicide and crisis hotline and services.
If you recognize these signs, it doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means it’s time to get help.
Getting Help
Talk to your GP or OB-GYN: They can refer you to counseling or check for postpartum mood disorders.
Therapy: CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) can help reframe painful thought patterns; EMDR can help if you’re reliving the trauma of miscarriage (APA).
Support groups: Connecting with others who’ve been through loss can reduce isolation.
Key Takeaways
Crying after miscarriage is normal — it’s part of grieving.
Around 25–30% of people experience more serious conditions like depression, anxiety, or PTSD after loss.
If sadness comes with hopelessness, flashbacks, or an inability to function, it may be time to seek help.
Reaching out for support is not weakness — it’s an act of care for yourself.
✨ Sibyl is being built to normalize the full range of grief responses — from tears to trauma — and to connect you with coping strategies and resources if your loss feels unbearable. Sign up for our beta to help shape it here: https://www.sibyl.care/signup
References:
